


A Tall Tail of an Easter Story

by Pennygirl612



Category: White Collar
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Smut, Sexual Content, definitely not canon, pre P/E/N?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-15 05:06:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18067148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pennygirl612/pseuds/Pennygirl612
Summary: It's Good Friday and Peter takes the day off from work without telling Neal.  Of course Neal being Neal, he has to find out exactly what Peter is up too.  This leads to Neal seeing a lot more than he bargained for as Peter and Elizabeth try to maintain a secret.  (This is a fluff, crack Easter story not meant to be taken seriously at all!)





	A Tall Tail of an Easter Story

**Author's Note:**

  * For [buefo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/buefo/gifts).



> This story was written in response to the Team Dekay Real Men Wear Pink Campaign fundraiser. It was requested by Emily who recklessly told me "if you have any bunnies hopping around that you'd like to set free, go for it!" I'm not sure I was supposed to take her bunny comment literal, but I have limited control over this crazy mind of mine! Anyway, I hope Emily and everyone enjoys an early Easter present.

Leaving work at the end of the day all kinds of warning bells were going off in Neal’s head. Something wasn’t right. The most unlikely thing had happened. Peter had taken the day off. Peter never took a day off. Peter was a complete workaholic and only when Hughes threw a fit over his “use or lose” leave did Peter succumb. Even then Neal knew he took a briefcase full of cold cases home with him. But this was April and no need for Peter to be burning leave yet. So why had he taken the day off?

Neal briefly thought about it being Good Friday. However, Peter was a lapsed Catholic so Neal dismissed any religious reason for Peter’s absence. Racking his brain, Neal couldn’t come up with anything else special about the day. It wasn’t a birthday or anniversary. Maybe what bothered Neal the most was the fact that Peter had failed to mention anything to Neal about taking the day off or planning something special for the weekend. Or maybe what bothered him most was that Peter hadn’t even bothered to call or check in on him all day and Neal was feeling neglected. No, something wasn’t right at all.

Taking out his cell phone, Neal dialed up the Burke house phone. On the fourth ring, Elizabeth answered sounding a little bit out of breath when she spoke. That piqued Neal’s curiosity even more.

Clearing his throat, Neal tried to sound apologetic as he questioned Peter’s wife. “Elizabeth, I’m calling to check on Peter. Is he under the weather?”

After a slight hesitation so slight that Neal almost thought he had imagined it, Elizabeth answered, “I’m afraid Peter’s not feeling like himself today.”

Neal felt his heart skip a beat. Something in Elizabeth’s voice sounded odd. He tried to play it off and garner more information. “I hate to hear that. Is there anything I can do?” 

“No, no,” Elizabeth answered quickly, maybe a little too quickly, Neal thought? “I’m sure Peter will be back to normal come Monday.”

Again Neal’s gut told him something was out of the ordinary. It seemed like Elizabeth was carefully choosing her words as if she was afraid to say the wrong thing. Red alert sirens were now exploding in Neal’s head. If Elizabeth was acting this way, it likely meant Peter was hiding something from Neal. Hanging up the phone, Neal paced for only a moment before deciding his next step. He would just have to go to the Burke home himself to see what was going on.  
****

When Elizabeth hung up the phone, her husband was staring at her, a look of non-amusement on his face. “You’ve been hanging around Neal too long,” he informed her with a shake of his head.

“I don’t know what you mean?” Elizabeth said feigning ignorance. “I didn’t lie to him. Clearly with---that,” she said pointing at him, “you aren’t yourself. And I know that--” again pointing “—won’t be there come Monday.”

Peter fixed her with a look that said he wasn’t buying her logic. “All further proving my point. A version of the truth isn’t the same as being honest. I have to preach the difference to Neal all the time.”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes at his attempt to lecture. She was the one being like Neal when his words were classic Caffrey misdirect from the issue before them?! Calling him out on it, she asked, “Hon, would you have preferred for me to tell him about--?”

Immediately, Peter cut her off, “No, no, of course not, but it’s Neal! After that little performance of yours, he’s likely on his way over here even as we speak.”

Elizabeth nodded in agreement. She had already drawn the same conclusion which meant they needed a game plan. “And when he comes?”

“When he comes, what?” Peter asked bewildered at her question. “He can’t see me like this. No one can see me like this! It’s embarrassing.” Even at the thought of Neal seeing him in his current state, Peter’s face was shading pink.

Elizabeth sashayed over to Peter pulling him in close. Staring up at her husband as she reached around to his behind, she said in a low and sultry voice, “It’s sexy as hell is what it is.”

Peter blushed even harder as he light-heartedly swatted her hand away. “Quit playing with my tail, hon!”

Elizabeth giggled, but returned her hand to stroking the fluffy, white cotton ball-like tail that had magically sported on Peter’s behind overnight. “Do you really want me to stop?” Elizabeth asked him. With their bodies meddled together, she could already feel her husband’s growing reaction to what she was doing. 

Knowing he was already too far gone to stop her now, Peter closed his eyes sighing in contentment letting his head fall backward. As Elizabeth continued moving her hand in a torturously slow circular pattern around the edges of the fur, Peter remained still, simply taking in the pleasure he was receiving. When she playfully gave his whole tail a hard squeeze, Peter’s eyes snapped open revealing pupils blown with lust. She attempted unsuccessfully to back away from his reach but Peter was able to grab her and effortlessly picked her up. Squealing happily, Elizabeth wrapped her legs around Peter’s waist as he carried her over to the bed. 

A short while later the couple laid together, Elizabeth breathing heavy from their lovemaking. Although he was ready to go again (one of the perks of his condition), Peter knew he had to give Elizabeth some time to recuperate. They had learned the hard way that while Peter would desire sex nonstop all weekend long (another side effect), Elizabeth needed to pace herself. After all, she was no Energizer Bunny and shouldn’t be expected to keep up with her hopping husband. 

Feeling the warmth of her body next to his, Peter was reminded of just how lucky he was to have found her. It took a special woman to cope with his family’s little secret. When she had finally found out, and he had hid it from her for as long as he possibly could; Elizabeth had barely batted an eye and instead was more curious than anything. She listened in rapt fascination as he had proceeded to tell her of his family’s long history of rabbit traits and physical attributes dating back to even before his Burke ancestors had crossed the Atlantic Ocean. 

Peter remembered Elizabeth listening intently as he gave her the same speech his own parents had told him when puberty hit. She had laughed with him when instead of the birds and bees Peter advised his parents had spoken of bunnies, bucks, and does. She learned that the transformation only lasted the three days surrounding Easter weekend and for unknown reasons only affected males. He had quickly pointed out that it also skipped every other generation so should they have children they would not be affected. Elizabeth had been quiet for a moment and then had said, “So that explains why you and your grandfather are named Peter but not your dad.” Peter had nodded and Elizabeth had only answered, “Huh.” And that had been it. Elizabeth had simply accepted his condition. 

As desire started building up again, Peter went to reach for Elizabeth when the doorbell chimed. “Neal,” Peter groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“I seriously doubt he’s going to go away,” Elizabeth advised now feeling more sympathetic to her husband’s plight. Neal was always a wildcard, and it was anyone’s guess on how he would react if he knew Peter’s secret. 

“No, I’m sure not. Any ideas?” Peter asked hoping she could somehow pull a rabbit out of her hat.

Elizabeth shot her husband a wicked grin as inspiration struck. “Actually, I do. But you’re not going to like it!”

Listening to her proposal, Peter grew more and more flushed. His wife was right. While he didn’t like her plan one bit, he had to admit it was just ludicrous enough to actually work.  
****

Neal wasn’t exactly sure what he had expected to find once he had arrived at the Burke townhouse, but it certainly wasn’t this! Never in his wildest dreams did he think he would ever see Peter Burke blindfolded with both ankles and wrists bound to the bed. Okay, maybe in his wildest dreams he actually had envisioned that exact scenario. However, never had Peter been dressed in a red-laced bra and matching colored boy short underwear! 

Neal stood at the bedroom’s doorway, stunned, unable to move or speak. He knew he should avert his eyes but like watching a train wreck, he couldn’t seem to turn away. He knew he should excuse himself, step back, and give Peter his privacy. Yet, he couldn’t seem to get his feet to work and suddenly his mouth was drier than the Sahara desert. Absently, he licked his lips as he continued to stare.

Sensing Neal’s presence, Peter asked dryly. “Like what you see, Neal?”

That snapped Neal out of his frozen state. Without a word, he fled the bedroom to return downstairs where Elizabeth sat calmly on the couch. She was clearly amused by Neal’s anxious behavior as he paced, ran hands threw his hair, and occasionally muttered to himself. She remained silent waiting him out. Finally, he stopped. He stood directly in front of her, hands now shoved into his pockets, rocking back and forth on the toes of his feet. His cheeks were an unusually deep shade of red. 

“Elizabeth, I--” Neal began, clearly flustered and unsure of what to say. 

Elizabeth was even more amused having never seen Neal so thrown off his game before. Feeling no sympathy for him, she bluntly reminded him that she had said that Peter was tied up when she had tried to stop him from going upstairs.

“You should have tried harder!” Neal snapped an exasperated look on his face. “You wanted me to see that!”

“Maybe,” she acknowledged with a shrug. “Was it really that bad?” Elizabeth countered with a knowing smile. 

“I may never get the image of Peter in your underwear out of my head!” Neal answered while noticeably avoiding all eye contact with her. He clearly wasn’t ready to give serious consideration to what she was implying. 

Now Elizabeth frowned. “Neal, don’t be ridiculous! Peter’s way too big to fit into my underwear. Those belonged to him.”

Neal looked sharply at her. “Not helping!” 

Elizabeth only giggled at Neal’s distressed state. “But did you like them? I could get you a pair.”

Neal ignored her words as a sudden need for flight took a firm hold on him. “I think it’s best if we agree I saw nothing and we never, ever speak of this again. In fact I was never here.” With that Neal kept his eyes low and as gracefully as he could, he made his exit from the Burke home.

Returning upstairs, Elizabeth took a moment to appreciate the state her husband was in before she removed the blindfold and restraints and crawled into bed with him. “Hon, I have to say, you look hot in those shorts.”

Smiling shyly, Peter acknowledged how the silk really did feel good against his tail. Clearing his throat, Peter’s face turned red. “So how traumatized was he?”

Elizabeth laughed, “Very, but not for the reasons you think.” Seeing Peter’s eyes grow large, Elizabeth placed a calming hand on his chest. “Don’t worry, hon, we will all survive this. It could even be fun.” When it looked like he was going to say something stupid to deny what they both already knew to be true, Elizabeth kissed him effectively shutting Peter up. 

Lying there, Peter’s thoughts were running rampant with what Elizabeth had just so casually put out there. It was something they had never openly discussed. Before he could give it any further consideration, Peter was distracted by Elizabeth absently touching him again, trying her best to wedge her hand underneath him to get at his fluff ball. 

In an attempt to counter block, Peter turned to face her and by that movement keeping his tail further away. The pour pout on her face made Peter chuckle. “The tail really does turn you on, doesn’t it?” Turning towards her husband so that they were now face to face, Elizabeth gave Peter his answer in the way her blue eyes sparkled up into his and in the warmth of her smile. 

With a goofy grin planted on his face, Peter shook his head. “I’m not sure if I should love you for feeling that way or be more concerned about what that actually says about you.”

Grinning up at him, Elizabeth answered smartly, “Probably both.”

Just then Peter’s nose began twitching. Absently, he rubbed the area.

“Starting to feel it?” Elizabeth asked excitement evident in her voice as she recognized the sign of another transformation. 

When Peter nodded, Elizabeth smiled, “Good. As much as I like the tail, I love the whiskers even more.”


End file.
